Here's a small sample from her engagement portfolio:
Original hereIt's tough to take in all at once. Let me break all the atrociousness down for you. Oh, man. That backdrop! Just because there is a backdrop company that makes those hideous designs, doesn't mean you have to buy them. There's the offensive use of plastic ivy that was thrown around in such a caviler manner. The bizarre rug that is either trying to look like a dirty Oriental or a rectangular shape of hide from a brown cow; also dirty.
The most ghastly of all is the pose. Let's just ignore the fact that he looks like he's about to start a porn scene with the way his legs are positioned. Are we really supposed to buy that they happened to be picnicking in a badly painted wooded area in matching outfits, when he decided to pop the question? And there is a photographer there to capture this candid moment? What are the odds?! Didn't the people in this photo feel like asses when following the photographer's direction? I bet they did when they finally realized they paid actual money to look this foolish.
The most ghastly of all is the pose. Let's just ignore the fact that he looks like he's about to start a porn scene with the way his legs are positioned. Are we really supposed to buy that they happened to be picnicking in a badly painted wooded area in matching outfits, when he decided to pop the question? And there is a photographer there to capture this candid moment? What are the odds?! Didn't the people in this photo feel like asses when following the photographer's direction? I bet they did when they finally realized they paid actual money to look this foolish.
Let's move on to her newborn work:
The photographer has perfectly executed a marvelous shot of this soccer ball. It just so happens to have a human baby attached to it.
This last picture is... well, just look:
Original hereShe so excellently applied the most used and abused trick of trying to make a photo interesting. Do you know what it is? No, it's not that scary like border or Photoshopping the photo to make it look as if it was drawn. It's the god awful effect known as color selection or what I call, the "color solo." Sometimes it can be a color duo or even a color trio. Usually anymore than that though, is just pointless unless the object is a rainbow lollipop or something similar in design. Being an amateur photographer and studying real professional photographers' portfolios for years, I can honestly say, I've only seen two successful attempts at the color solo and this ain't one of them. I think this photo may have blessed us with a color duo. Although I'm not sure if the photographer just selected all the colors in the red and orange family because she wasn't aware enough to think they aren't the same color. I mean really, taking a quick gander at her portfolio, I wouldn't be surprised if this photographer was blind in one eye.
Even if the color solo had worked, what are we supposed to be focusing on? The color duo would have me assume we are supposed to gaze in wonderment of this man's tattoos. The Thundercat's logo(?) and treasure map(?) breaking through his skin? (Whatever, I'm not here to judge tattoos.) Are we supposed to be looking at the father who looks uncannily like that guy from Color Me Badd? (Because the extra 'd' really makes one a rebel!) Or are we supposed to be studying the baby who, judging by the look on his face, obviously just took a massive shit in his daddy's hands? You decide.
Disclaimer: I own absolutely no rights to these photos. (Not that I'd want to.) The photographer who owns these photos can be found here
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